*dusts off*

Posted in Uncategorized on February 27, 2015 by velvettonsils57

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What I’ve been doing instead of blogging here these past 3 years…

Sorry that this blog has been essentially static since May of 2012, which is coming up on 3 years (holy crap, really?!?). Life has changed a lot since I last used this account, in some ways positively, and a handful overwhelmingly negatively.

I don’t have as much to post about as most do, so blogging is probably not for me. I’m unsure how people manage it because I struggle to write about much. If you’re for whatever reason following this blog, don’t despair, I will post at some point, but if I give you an estimate when then it won’t be then…

-velvettonsils57

Original Calls to Frank Garrett

Posted in Uncategorized on September 27, 2011 by velvettonsils57

UPDATED 2/20/2015: quality improvement and calls previously unreleased to Frank have been added to parts 2, 5, 7 and 8. Originally I used a file compressor to size down parts 5, 7 and 8, which forced the calls into mono audio and a large downsize in quality. I didn’t mind at the time, but I’ve become much more of an audiophile since then. Enjoy what is, for now, the definitive collection of calls to Frank. The links remain the same, but the files are now different, so download the newest versions of these.

UPDATE NOTICE #2 3/31/2017: Updated part 6 with a call I missed (“Jack calls Frank” by MistahBlonde). He released it in May 2012, but was made sometime in 2010. I had to guess where, so I placed it roughly in November of 2010. It went under my radar when I updated in 2015. Frank has been gone for 5 years now, and he truly is the gift that keeps giving. File size is slightly larger, but should be good quality still.

MistahBlonde already did this from my site on webs. I keep making changes like a twat… So here’s the collection from the guy who made his own collection. I started this so I’d have something to listen to while I was up north with no internet connection, of course that purpose was when the calls to Frank were under 2 hours in 2009. I started it before Guardian/dozerconstruction did at some point in the same year.

The calls and those who created them are listed. I don’t know/can’t find any info on who made some, so if youve made them tell me…

Volume 1 (2007-August 2009):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?t9pu3c9x2dnsk02 (22.56MB)
“Hey has yer mama still got…. Uh worms
crawlin’ out her pusseh?”

Deacon Frost calls a Construction Company (w3baholicX)
Samuel L. Jackson calls Duncan (xaozzz)
Angry Black Gangsta calls Duncan (xaozzz)
Angry Black Guy calls Duncan (xaozzz)
Duncan calls himself (xaozzz)
Duncan calls himself again (XxVideoPersonxX)
XxVideoPersonxX calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Jeff Boomhauer calls Duncan (SoCalCoaster) (NOTE: Reconstruction of Call. Parts 1 and 2 of the original two calls made with Boomhauer are probably lost forever amidst the Duncan Scare of 2008.)
Tom the Pissed Off Roofer calls Duncan (xaozzz)
Chinaman calls Duncan (xaozzz)
Junkyard Willie calls Duncan (bigbandpistachio)
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself a third time (xaozzz)
Duncan calls his granddaughter and himself (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan is three wayed into a conversation with Ab-Rocket hotline (ChugBoat)
Biff Tannen calls a Construction Company (Gabe B.)
Duncan calls himself a fourth time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Arnold’s Escort calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself a fifth time (XxVideoPersonxX)
XxVideoPersonxX apologizes to Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls his granddaughter (xaozzz)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
XxVideoPersonxX calls Duncan Construction (XxVideoPersonxX)
Jeff Boomhauer calls Duncan a third time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself a sixth time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Angry Black Guy calls Duncan again ()
Duncan calls himself a seventh time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Tom the Pissed Off Roofer calls Duncan again (PrankVideoCompiler)
Duncan calls himself an eighth time (Y2Jericho)
The Village Idiot calls Duncan (Y2Jericho)
Duncan calls himself a ninth time (xaozzz)
Colleen the Flower Girl calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
The Village Idiot calls Duncan again (XxVideoPersonxX)
Epic Crazy Lady’s Husband calls Duncan (dizeestl)
The Student calls Duncan (dizeestl)
Duncan calls himself a tenth time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself an eleventh time (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself a twelfth time (verdantabyss)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan (fortunecookiesucks)
Satanic Racist calls Duncan (UltimatePrankCalls)
JJCoree calls Duncan (via text to speech) (JJCoree)
Duncan calls himself a thirteenth time at New Year’s (XxVideoPersonxX)
PrankVideoCompiler attempts to apologize to Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
Denzel Washington calls Duncan (w3baholicX)
Deckard Cain calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Satanic Racist calls Duncan again (XxVideoPersonxX)
fortunecookiesucks complains to Duncan (fortunecookiesucks)
Joe Pesci calls Duncan (Beatlemania2009)
Springfield Pervert calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
A to Z Pawn (Charles) calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
Satanic Racist calls Duncan a third time (PrankVideoCompiler)
Tom the Pissed Off Roofer calls Duncan a third time (PrankVideoCompiler)
Duncan calls himself a fourteenth time (TehPrankCaller)
Jackass Plumber calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
Duncan calls one of his employees and himself (PrankVideoCompiler)
Black Lady calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
The Village Idiot calls Duncan a third time (PrankVideoCompiler)
The Young Redneck calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
Duncan calls himself a fifteenth time ()
Duncan calls himself a sixteenth time (PrankVideoCompiler)
Duncan calls himself a seventeenth time on Mother’s Day ()
virusmakers calls Duncan (virusmakers)
666j1 calls Duncan (666j1)
Duncan calls himself a eighteenth time ()
Duncan calls himself an nineteenth time (autovanroberts)
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan again (autovanroberts)
Blue Iris calls Duncan (autovanroberts)
Duncan calls himself a twentieth time (autovanroberts)
Butthead calls Duncan (autovanroberts)
Blue Iris calls Duncan again (autovanroberts)
Redneck Bitch calls Duncan (SoundBoardCalls)
Duncan calls himself for the twenty-first time (XxVideoPersonxX)
AA Guy calls Duncan (enjoicam)
Chris the Hacker calls Duncan (XxVideoPersonxX)
Duncan calls himself for the twenty-second time (XxVideoPersonxX)
TheHoboMolester5000 calls Duncan (TheHoboMolester5000)

Volume 2 (August 2009-February 2010):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?hw7l0ilbt4zee4o (23.3MB)-last updated 2/20/2015
“Oh fuck yew, yer interruptin’ my breakfast!”

The Racist Redneck calls Duncan (fortunecookiesucks)
“Duncan Construction” song left on Duncan’s voicemail (SBCallingYew)
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan a third time (MrOfftheChainz)
Brucie calls Duncan (MrOfftheChainz)
Duncan calls himself the twenty-third time (MrOfftheChainz)
Duncan’s Mother’s Friend calls Duncan (enjoicam)
Confused Grandpa Jack calls Duncan (666j1)
Duncan calls himself the twenty-fourth time (666j1)
666j1 calls Duncan again (666j1)
Jackass Plumber and Duncan calls Duncan’s Granddaughter (Beatlemania2009)
Mr88Nismo calls Duncan about Charles (Mr88Nismo)
Duncan’s Mother’s Friend calls Duncan again (ChrisSantos21)
The Village Idiot leaves a message for Duncan ()
The Racist Redneck calls Duncan again (elelisrael)
Sal the Bar Guy calls Duncan (elelisrael)
Duncan calls himself a twenty-fifth time (CootPrankCalls)
Redneck Bitch calls Duncan again (TheCaptainJackass)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan a third time (fortunecookiesucks)
Mr88Nismo calls Duncan to get a bid (Mr88Nismo)
Beatlemania2009 calls Duncan (Beatlemania2009)
Jack Nicholson calls Duncan (Beatlemania2009)
Wilford Brimley calls Duncan (enjoicam)
Darth Vader calls Duncan (fortunecookiesucks)
The Racist Redneck calls Duncan a third time (fortunecookiesucks)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan a fourth time (fortunecookiesucks)
Deputy Martin calls Duncan (fortunecookiesucks)
Darth Vader calls Duncan again (fortunecookiesucks)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan as Charles (fortunecookiesucks)-likely the catalyst in Frank’s confrontation with Charles from A-Z Pawn, as a result it was not released until 2014
Mr88Nismo calls Duncan a third time (Mr88Nismo)
Gay Florist calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Life Coach calls Duncan (PrankVideoCompiler)
666j1 wishes Frank a Merry Christmas (666j1 & maximusclecyclone)
Satanic Racist calls Duncan a fourth time (zoltan5616)
Kevin McAllister & Johnny the Gangster call Duncan (zoltan5616)
666j1 wishes Frank a happy New Year (666j1 & CootPrankCalls)
PrankVideoCompiler wishes Frank a happy New Year (PrankVideoCompiler)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan (yellowtelaviv)
Don Cherry calls Duncan (AntiVenom9808)
Crazy Alice calls Duncan (Watt91)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan again (SBCallingYew)
Epic Crazy Lady’s Husband calls Duncan again (Mr88Nismo)

Volume 3 (February 2010-July 2010):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?s3x14ds2tl5a9z7 (27.58MB)
“Ain’t that cool, you got a soundboard!”

2010 is when the calls to Frank went totally out of control, though some say it was out of control beforehand. However 2007-2009 only span to 2 hours worth of calls, maybe a little more counting missing or unreleased calls to Frank. Yet 2010-2011 alone are 6 hours worth of calls. The person seemingly calling Frank the most was zoltan5616, who often just called him with horribly pointless and unfunny soundboards. (though did get some good lines outta Frank…)

Matt Damon calls Duncan (MistahBlonde)
Hulk Hogan calls Duncan (DragonSanPrankCalls)
Duke Nukem calls Duncan (DragonSanPrankCalls)
Gary Busey calls Duncan (darkness109234)
Jared calls Duncan (MrOfftheChainz)
Mr88Nismo calls Duncan a fifth time (Mr88Nismo)
Jackass Plumber calls Duncan again (SBCallingYew)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a third time (Mr88Nismo)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a fourth time (Mr88Nismo)
Bacation Lady calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Duncan calls himself a twenty-sixth time (TheGoldenPhone)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a fifth time (TheGoldenPhone)
Random Asshole calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
TheGoldenPhone calls Duncan – disguised by text-to-speech (TheGoldenPhone)
az90az90az90az calls Duncan (az90az90az90az)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan a sixth time (fortunecookiesucks)
The Racist Redneck calls Duncan a fourth time (SBCallingYew)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a sixth time (hacktgs2)
trufucknplaya calls Duncan (trufucknplaya)
Mad Mopar Man calls Duncan (Mr88Nismo)
Mr88Nismo & his friend hassle Duncan (Mr88Nismo)
Mr88Nismo calls Duncan a seventh time (Mr88Nismo)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a seventh time (PrankersUnited)
Mr88Nismo Soundboard calls Duncan ()
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan a fourth time (TheGoldenPhone)
Philly Thug calls Duncan (PrankCallFan845)
Bacation Lady & Rick the Mullet Man call Duncan (zoltan5616)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan a fifth time (zoltan5616)

Volume 4 (July 2010-September 2010)
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?mm6yebzziyueift (26.19MB)
“Oh yew god damned little snotty nosed pimple faced mother fucker yew!”

Arnold Police Officer & Rick call Duncan (Mr88Nismo)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Irate Black Man calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a tenth time collect (Mr88Nismo)
Duncan calls Back (Mr88Nismo)
Blue Iris calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Bob Chandler calls Duncan (MistahBlonde)
Random Asshole calls Duncan again (MistahBlonde)
dozerconstruction calls Duncan (dozerconstruction)
Peter Popoff calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Bob Chandler calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Business Man, his Deputy and Sergeant Libsky call Duncan (zoltan5616)
Steve Macabee and Deputy Martin call Duncan (zoltan5616)
Deputy Duncan calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Charles calls Duncan again (AfghaNPranksteR)
Angry Scottish Woman calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Sergeant Jonathan Fields calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Homer and Billye Scott call Duncan (MistahBlonde)
Homer and Billye Scott call Duncan again (TheGoldenPhone)
Richard Simons calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
Prank-Dial Gay Guy calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Prank-Dial Pizza Guy calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Duncan’s Mother’s Friend calls Duncan a third time (jaggerpot)
Prank-Dial Redneck calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Prank-Dial Boyfriend calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Duncan calls himself a twenty-seventh time (jaggerpot)
Prank-Dial Redneck calls Duncan again (TheGoldenPhone)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan again (TheGoldenPhone)
Business Man calls Duncan again (Firebird85)

Volume 5 (September 2010-October 2010):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?hffqbzmawpzke8o (36.8MB)-last updated 2/20/2015
“What’s yer name, worm?”

Wal-Mart Guy calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan an eleventh time (Bladez636)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Chris from Completely Clean calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Chris from Completely Clean calls Duncan again (Firebird85)
trufucknplaya calls Duncan about Homer Scott (trufucknplaya)
Chris from Completely Clean calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Arnold Schwarzenegger & Alabama Yokel call Duncan (zoltan5616)
Charles calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Deputy Martin calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5615)
Bob & Barbara Chandler call Duncan a third time (zoltan5615)
Duncan calls himself a twenty-eighth time (TheGoldenPhone)
dozerconstruction calls Duncan again (dozerconstruction)
Chris Chan calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Frank Rizzo calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
Angry Newspaper Guy calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Rude Lawyer calls Duncan on the Road (TheGoldenPhone)
Sheriff Buford T. Johnson calls Duncan (dozerconstruction)
Duncan calls himself a twenty-ninth time (TheGoldenPhone)
Jesus Guy calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Epic Crazy Lady calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
The Spirit of Truth calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Dick’s Last Resort Guy calls Duncan (BloodyMargie)
dozerconstruction calls Duncan a third time (dozerconstruction)
ChrisV420 Soundboard calls Duncan (Bladez636)
Big Chief calls Duncan (BigBirdNazi)
Canadian Teen calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Wife Beater calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Duncan’s Mother’s Friend calls Duncan a fourth time (AfghaNPranksteR)

Volume 6 (October 2010-December 2010):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?omgamz4ux9c8rvn (34.42MB)-last updated 3/31/2017
“HEEEY FRANK!”

Duncan is three wayed into a call with the Redneck Roofer (MistahBlonde)
Police Officer calls Duncan (TheGoldenPhone)
Tony the Racist calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Jesus Woman calls Duncan a fourth time (zoltan5616)
Internet Telemarketer calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Duncan is three wayed into a call with a Confused Woman (MistahBlonde)
Rude Woman calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
Tiesha calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Angry Black Guy calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
SBCallingYew & TehPrankCaller call Duncan (SBCallingYew & TehPrankCaller)
Canadian Teen calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Arnold’s Escort calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Blue Iris calls Duncan a fourth time (zoltan5616)
Jake & Jesus Lady calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Homer & his wife annoy Frank again (MistahBlonde)
Chris the Hacker calls Duncan again (MistahBlonde)
Jackass Plumber calls Duncan a third time (SBCallingYew)
Jack calls Duncan (MistahBlonde)
Prayer Lady & Jesus Lady call Duncan (zoltan5616)
Bible Man calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Jesus Guy calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Prayer Lady calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan a seventh time (zoltan5616)
Bible Man calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
Frank Rizzo calls Duncan again (AfghaNPranksteR)

Volume 7 (December 2010-April 2011):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?37gpet7da99wlzu (21.1MB)-last updated 2/20/2015
“You don’t like me, you got a reason, well come on down. We’ll settle it the old fashioned way; I’ll beat yer ass up and you’ll go home and suck yer mama’s titty or whatever you need to do!”

Here we start seeing signs that would lead up to Frank’s death in the next
part. In February 2011, Frank was in the hospital evidently and why is really
unknown.

Sal the Bar Guy calls Duncan again (?¿)
The Young Redneck calls Duncan again (?¿)
Billye Scott calls Duncan a fourth time (AfghaNPranksteR)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan an eighth time (AfghaNPranksteR)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan a fifth time (AfghaNPranksteR)
Yankee Tough Guy calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
itzmurda81 calls Duncan and successfully makes a business deal (itzmurda81)
Random Asshole calls Duncan a third time (TehPrankCaller)
Drug & Alcohol Lady calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
Gay Florist calls Duncan again (TheMasterCall)
TheMasterCall calls Duncan (TheMasterCall)
Charles calls Duncan a fourth time (MistahBlonde)
Threats calls Duncan (BloodyMargie)
Mini-Frank calls Duncan (BloodyMargie)
fortunecookiesucks calls Duncan to wish him a Merry Christmas (fortunecookiesucks)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan a sixth time (Mr88Nismo)
Prayer Lady calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
MistahBlonde calls Duncan (MistahBlonde)
Mr88Nismo Soundboard calls Duncan again (MistahBlonde)
Jesus Lady calls Duncan a ninth time (AfghaNPranksteR)
Dunkin’ Donuts Guy calls Duncan (AfghaNPranksteR)
Tiesha calls Duncan again (Docthal010)
Irate Black Man calls Duncan again (Docthal010)
Jesus Lady leaves Duncan a message (Docthal010)
Charles calls Duncan a fifth time ()
Epic Crazy Lady’s Husband calls Duncan again (PrankCallFan845)
Yankee Tough Guy calls Duncan again (BloodyMargie)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan in the Hospital (zoltan5616)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan in the Hospital (zoltan5616)
TheMasterCall calls Duncan in the Hospital (TheMasterCall)
Arnold Schwarzenegger calls Duncan in the Hospital (TheMasterCall)
TheMasterCall calls Duncan in the Hospital (TheMasterCall)
Alabama Yokel calls Duncan a ninth time (PrankEnterprises)
Duke Nukem calls Duncan again (TheMasterCall)
Duncan calls himself for the thirtieth time (MakaveliDaDon777)
Charles calls Duncan a fifth time (PrankEnterprises)
Mini-Frank calls Duncan again (BloodyMargie)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a thirteenth time (BigBirdNazi)
New York City Cunt calls Duncan (bubbacalling)
Jack calls Duncan again (zoltan5616)
TheMasterCall calls Duncan a third time (TheMasterCall)
New York City Cunt calls Duncan again (bubbacalling)
Jake calls Duncan a third time (zoltan5616)
Redneck Roofer calls Duncan (zoltan5616)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan a fourteenth time (zoltan5616)

Volume 8 (final – April 2011-July 2011):
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?aoj3wk2cme2gu02 (17.7MB)-last updated 2/20/2015
“Yew talk like a man with a paper asshole!”

These are the final calls to Frank. Frank died on July 3, 2011.

Billye and Homer Scott call Frank a fourth time (RobbersQuest)
BBCRadio1 calls to order a Pizza from Duncan Construction (?)
Mark the Wanker calls Duncan (Bladez636)
Billye and Satanic Racist call Duncan (TheMasterCall)
TheMasterCall & RobbersQuest call Duncan (TheMasterCall)
Homer Scott calls Duncan during an Operation (RobbersQuest)
Canadian Teen calls Duncan a third time (MistahBlonde)
Charles calls Duncan a sixth time (MistahBlonde)
Rick the Mullet Man calls Duncan for the fifteenth and final time (Mr88Nismo)
Bobby Hill, Sue Johanson, Chris Hansen, Springfield Pervert and Duncan call Duncan (Docthal010)
LevKozlodoev calls Duncan (LevKozlodoev)
Mad Mopar Man calls Duncan again (kaptaintrips)
MistahBlonde calls Duncan guising as a Dr. Hardens to get info on Frank’s hospitalization (MistahBlonde)
Docthal010 calls Duncan (Docthal010)
Billye, Homer and XxVideoPersonxX apology Soundboard calls Duncan (RobbersQuest) – Frank says nothing really, so this is really a sad last call to a legend. Seems as if Frank has no energy to even reply
TheMasterCall calls Stilwell, Oklahoma Funeral Home to confirm the worst (TheMasterCall)
A small tribute to Frank plays as the end theme to this – R.I.P Frank “Neal” Garrett

Frank was not a very good man in person according to his family and friends, where he basically treated most everyone as he did in the calls, but that means nothing to us. Frank provided us entertainment and joy while causing major moments of tard-rage for others who had the fortune to be called by his soundboard. Frank knew what the game was, but Frank didn’t give a shit so he used our calls to pass his time and give someone for him to cuss out and was only truly pissed when he was busy. Frank was called from around the world and is internet famous in a more or less underground way, certainly not in a Tourette’s Guy way unfortunately. Frank thought we called him because we hated him, that’s farthest from the truth in any form.

“When I go to hell, I may get it but it’d be after I get there” Frank G.

Greetings

Posted in Uncategorized on September 21, 2011 by velvettonsils57

Hellow degenerate beings. I’m not sure why I got a wordpress. I don’t blog a lot, but I do love to bitch about things.

You should know me by now, and if you don’t; why’re you even here right now? Well, I am Bladez636, whose plastered his lifeless ass all around the internet. I’m a pessimistic, angry and utterly unpleasant individual. I am an artist and a sound editor, though the former is really something I don’t feel much like doing lately…

I am the definition of a proud narcassist. I am not of the status-quo and stand for destroying their culture. I’ve aspergers syndrome, which means I’m one of millions of individuals facepalming for having the same disorder as Chris Chan (Yes Chris, Aspergers is a form of Autism, deal with that fact). My interests lie in underground works, that you’ve never heard of, I assure you.

Why is my username here velvettonsils57? Because my tonsils were velvet…. Until I had them removed in 2008….. Well actually it’s because of this.

If you’ve any questions, direct them to that wall over there and pretend I give a shit.